Saturday, December 4, 2010

What the hell

is going on here.

Somebody better come up with a damn fine story and tell it to me ASAP.

I want to be entertained.
Soothed.
Perplexed.
Titillated.
Charmed.
Enraged.

Something
Anything.

Let your fingers do the walking and type me up something good and fine and delicious. Give me something that causes you to laugh so hard while you're writing it that you're not sure you can type. Makes your soul cough up on my computer screen. Get's those voices in your head that say you can't write that! all rattled up and talking as you say it anyway.

Something I can sink my teeth into and chomp down on it like the pit bull that I am. Or caresses me like ribbons I would have worn in my hair when I was a girl if I would have known how. It all depends on what someone is willing to write.

Stop dreaming about my pumpkin muffins and write.

Do it.

Or, if you insist upon withholding your goodness and wish to remain distracted, try this

VisuWords

It'll entertain a bunch of wordsmithy clowns like you for hours.

Of course, one thing I always think of when I get lost there is how wonderful it would be if that thing was a vibrator. I mean, shit, just look at it tingling and dancing all over the place just because I give it a little word to tap dance about.

Write, bitches.

Don't make me get my crow bar.

12 comments:

  1. For the love of God, somebody help MG out. I put my regret story on my personal blog instead of here.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I feel your (noun of your choice), MG, I really do. Actually, I feel really guilty.

    But let's look at the demographics here: we have 2 contributors going through a relationship breakup, 2 contributors on the verge of the same, one dealing with a fairly new-born baby (plus new town and new marriage), one dealing with reduced fertility, one who is maybe facing reluctant step-mom-ship, one who coordinates AAYSR as well as working and writing, and one who is a mother, step-mother and runs her own business. Plus two others I know very little about.

    This always happens with women's groups. We spread ourselves too thin. So, a timely reminder yes, but patience.

    Also, I couldn't write like you're asking for if my life depended on it. But I loved the link.

    ReplyDelete
  3. And I am trying to write something but I'm back in therapy and it is all so drippy self-involved.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I just put "patient" into VisuWords. It is especially titilliating.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh, and Cat? Don't be trying to sneak little things into your comments about how you can't write. Me no no believe you woman!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I couldn't do funny right now if my life depended on it, but if you want to read something that will tear your heart out, I'm your gal.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sorry, that was me, Zen Mama - not Ryley who has apparently been logged into gmail here on MY computer.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Flutter, are you on the roster yet? Would you like to be?

    ReplyDelete
  9. If I'm the reluctant stepmom, I'm happy to say that the whole Chinese baby thing seems to have been a passing whim.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm really glad for you, Elder.

    But I could tear my hair out about the number of times I get presented with an entirely unattractive proposal which it takes me ages to get my head around and accept, only to find that it was my acceptance that was necessary, not the thing/idea itself. I'm sick of being tested.

    All the same, being a country gal I'm hoping that the current proposal to move back to Madrid is going to fall into this category. I've already accepted (with my fingers crossed behind my back, how sincere is that?), and now I'm waiting to see if it was a passing phase.

    Ruby and MG, my stuff is all moany navel-gazing at the moment. You really don't want to hear what I'm self-censoring :).

    WV: quests....

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well don't start asking me questions now about what I think or don't think about what people should be posting here. I have no idea other than this ----> I have never once read something any of you wrote that didn't do something for me or to me.

    ReplyDelete